So I know my posts are generally pretty light-hearted and don’t worry folks, this one won’t get too dark. However, lately I have not been able to shake the feeling that the days are behind me of big dreams and picturing giant career success for myself. Now I know I’m still basically a fetus…I’m not even past a quarter of a century yet…but I can’t help but feel that if I was going to have achieved massive levels of success it would have happened by now, or in the very least I should feel confident that I am walking the path that leads to greatness. I am not confident in this, in fact lately I’ve felt lost and pretty much like I suck at life.
I mean I did everything you’re “supposed” to do – I did (relatively) well in school, followed up my undergrad with a heavy dose of grad school and throughout both of those I worked summer jobs that were supposed to create connections and business relationships…I even did an unpaid internship throughout my grad degree and volunteered with a Political Party. So I followed all the appropriate steps, was a great employee/student and always took the responsible route….so why then do I find myself in this state of “okay-ness”, rather than greatness?
Now…I don’t want you to think this is too much of a sob story – I am lucky enough to have a job at all, let alone a job that gives me paid sick leave, great benefits, and 3 weeks vacation/year. However, Im just left wondering if this is it? and if so, what came of all of my hard work, career drive and ambition? Is this cubicle what I was driving at this whole time? If so….I wish someone had warned me. I might have lived it up a little more on the journey here.
I apologize for the quarter life crisis vent…Ill be more positive and upbeat tomorrow…after all I had a test for one job competition this week and an interview for another…fingers crossed 🙂